A Very Special Day

Today was a very special day.

My joints still ached and my muscles were still weak and tired. I still felt dizzy and unstable when I got up from my bed. I still couldn't see or hear, and my mouth and nose were still sore and tender when I sneezed or tried to sniff things.

But today my breakfast was topped with freshly grated aged Parmesan. Today my lunch was a delightful medley of corned beef, smoked salmon and chicken, drizzled with extra virgin olive oil and topped with shredded mozarella. Today I got to eat cheese whiz and chocolate sauce! 

And today was truly very special because of the loads of extra hugs, kisses, and love I got from my family.

Peace out,

Elston

RIP Elston Kumar McLovin

2007 - 2023

Elston's Big Adventure

I may be 14 years old, blind (my glue-coma [sic] got really bad), and mostly deaf, but that's not going to stop me from having a good time.

I was out in our yard the other night when I noticed that the wind had blown the gate open. I wandered out to the sidewalk, sniffed around, and decided to go explore my neighborhood. Carpe diem! Or carpe noctis? I wondered down the street and encountered all kinds of interesting smells (my nose still works pretty well). Naturally I headed in the direction where I could smell food far in the distance, and with the all of the dogs marking the sidewalk every day, it was easy to find my way and avoid being in the street.

When I finally got to the area where the local restaurants are, I was totally bummed to find them all closed! If they'd been open at 1am, I'm pretty sure I could have scored all kinds of treats by just sitting in the doorway and using the good ol' head tilt (works every time!). 

So I ventured on, and found a nice park to explore. Lots of interesting scents from eagles, rabbits, squirrels, and from the beach below. I was getting pretty tired since it was waaaay past my bedtime, so I found a nice sheltered spot under a bush to take a nap. I was starting to miss my comfy home and my family. And food. I was really, really missing my food.

A few hours later I woke up to the sounds of chirping birds. I'd been out all night! I wandered around the park for quite a while, partly because it was interesting, but also because I'd kinda gotten lost (and beagles never ask for directions).

Eventually I reached the road again and continued my way along the sidewalk. I was checking out a front yard when a strange lady suddenly started to pet me. She seemed nice, but she wouldn't let me leave. Then I heard her talking on the phone and she mentioned my name! 

A few minutes later Mom and Dad showed up. I was so happy they had come to get me, and they were very relieved that I was okay (not a scratch on me). They said I'd been out for 16 hours and was over 1.5 miles from home! It had been a big adventure, and perhaps a little too big for an old beagle like me.

Old Fart Beagle

Big little sister said something about a birthday today, so I got my hopes up for cake! But then I found out it was my birthday, so no cake (bummer). Everyone seems to be giving me extra love and attention today, so its still a great day.

Turns out I'm 12-ish human years old today! Wow, how time flies. I can still remember how excited I was 11 years ago when my family brought me home, and how wonderful my life has been ever since.

Yes, I'm an old fart beagle, but also a very lucky one.

I'm Back!!!

I'm sure you've all been wondering where I've been for the last 4 years. No posts about stealing food, getting stinky, cheating death, etc. Well, my computer got a virus. But now I have a new one!

Much has changed since my last post. First, my family and I moved to Seattle for Dad's new job. I got stuffed into a crate a loaded into the cargo hold of a plane for the 4 hour flight across the country. No drinks, no peanuts, no in flight movie. I tell you, it was worse than flying coach!

Once we got to Seattle, we stayed in a downtown apartment for 3 months while my family looked for a new house. I really missed having a yard, but it was fun to try stealing whole fish during our regular visits to Pike Place Market. I also discovered a new hobby: affixing my poops to the sides of lamp posts!

Finally we moved into our new house, it's so sweet! It has three different levels, a nice yard, and I can lay on the new couch and get a commanding view of my territory.

Then things changed again a year ago when Mom's belly got big and she had another litter! Now I have two little sisters, and the new one has just started eating so I'm stoked about gaining 8 pounds again. The little one pulls on my tail, pokes my eyes and whacks my head, but as long as she keeps dropping food, I think I can live with that.

I Haz Acquired...

the wonderful smokey odor of rendered brisket fat. That is all.

I Love You, Man!!!

Sparkee and I have finally forgiven each other for our, ah, transgressions. We just had great time chasing each other through the yard and play fighting. It had been over a week and both of us had a ton of energy built up, so it felt so good to play together again.

Any dogs can fight, but only real dog friends forgive each other.

The Big Fight

As anyone who's seen a Jude Apatow movie knows, the big fight and subsequent falling out are a key part of the bromance genre. And sadly, Sparkee and I got into a huge fight earlier this week.

At this point I don't even remember what the fight was about, all I remember is that we beat the crap out of each other for about 10 minutes before our humans were finally able to break us up. Sparkee gave me a nice gash near my eye, and I think I gave Sparkee a nice gash on his side. And both our ears got pretty torn up.

It's been a few days now and I really miss my friend. :-( Hopefully there'll be a happy ending just like in the movies.

The Beagle Bromance

It's been a few weeks since Sparkee moved in next door, and I gotta tell you, it's been a blast!

If we're both outside, one of our humans will open the gate between our yards so we can play together. And now that the weather's warming up, we've been playing for two or three hours a day. :-)

And the other weekend Sparkee stayed at our house for a few nights while his family went on a trip. We got to play together all day long and then take a nice long naps by the sunny kitchen window.



I haven't been to the dog park in weeks cause I really don't need any more exercise. I'm sure all my friends are wondering where I am, but I guess that's what happens when you're in a 'beagle bromance'.

Sparkee!!!

Yesterday afternoon I went to my neighbor's house with the rest of my family (nothing unusual there), but this time there was doggy there! And not just any dog... another Beagle!!! His name is Sparkee and he's really fun to play with, we had a blast chasing and wrestling in the snow (he's the Beagle on the left).





I'm not sure if he was just visiting or if this is his new home. He was outside with the kids again this morning, so I'm really hoping that he's here for good (I'm keeping my paws crossed).

It's Not Just Me...

At least there's one human out there that hates Halloween as much as I do, and apparently so does her dog:

Why I Hate Halloween

It's That Time Of Year Again

It's getting colder outside, the leaves are falling, the kids are back in school, and all over the country, innocent dogs have to suffer the indignity and humiliation of looking like this chump:



That's right folks, it's time for a friendly reminder that despite how much you'd like it to be, Halloween is not a holiday celebrated by dogs. In fact, we freakin' loathe it.

For openers, there's the costumes. If you guys want to dress up like pirates, slutty nurses or vampires, go right ahead. But please remember that just because you like to parade yourself around the neighborhood looking like a total douche, it doesn't mean your dog does too.

And then there's the decorations. What you humans don't seem to realize is that even seemingly harmless things can be scary to some dogs; just ask Captain, he's afraid of baby strollers for crying out loud! So just think about that 20-foot tall inflatable Frankenstein you just stuck on your front lawn; some poor Pug's gonna walk by that thing and poop all over the ridiculous ballerina costume his owner made him wear...

Damn, Damn Skunk

A note to all you canines out there: if you get hit by a skunk, scratching does not get the smell out. In fact, it'll probably just give you some bad infected skin rashes that they make you wear one of these ridiculous things for.

Damn Skunk

It's been a few days since that skunk sprayed me in the face, and of course the smell is still there. Dad washed me really well right after it happened, and that did get most of it out, but not all of it.

It's worse when I get wet, but it's always lingering. And seeing as my nose is soooo good at detecting smells, well, you can imagine how much this sucks. I've tried scratching, licking, rolling on the grass, but it's still there. Dad says he'll check the pet store and see if they have any skunk cleaner that he can use on my face, I really hope he finds something. :-(

What An Exciting Day!

6:00am - Woke up and ate breakfast
6:10am - Went back to sleep
10:00am - Nap with Mom and Gabriella
1:35pm - Barfed
4:45pm - Went to the dog park
6:07pm - Stole and ate half a sandwich from some woman who was eating and chatting on her phone at the dog park
6:08pm - Stole and ate half a sandwich from the same woman's daughter
6:10pm - Left the dog park
9:15pm - Cornered a skunk in the back yard and got sprayed in the face
9:20pm - Bath time

My Baby Sister

Mom and Dad disappeared for a couple nights this week and I got to stay at my friend Muffin's house, but when they returned on Friday night they had a baby with them! At first Mom and Dad wouldn't let me too close to her, but once I stopped jumping up and acting like a crazy dog, they finally let me sniff her a bit.

She's very cute, and her name is Gabriella. She smells great, and I sneaked in a quick lick on her hair today and she tastes good too. Now whenever I come in from outside, the first thing I do is to figure out where she is so I can make sure she's okay. All she does right now is to eat, sleep and poop, so we have quite a bit in common.

My New Friend, Gunner

Dad took me to the dog park today. It was pretty dead when we first got there, but later on Captain and his owner arrived with their new dog Gunner. Gunner's a Beagle mixed with a Boston Terrier, but I don't hold that against him. He's only six months old and loves to chase and wrestle almost as much as I do. And the mud was pretty good too! Awesome. :-)

Best Dog Park Visit EVER!

Yesterday we finally had some nice weather in Chicago, so Dad took me to the dog park. It was awesome! I saw a bunch of my friends including Red the Basset Hound and Roscoe the Rat Terrier (he's a lot more pleasant now that's no longer humping everything) and I made some new ones too. And the mud is starting to develop a nice consistency.

I had so much energy, it took 2 hours and 15 minutes of running around like a crazy dog to wear me out! And I think I wore Dad out in the process. ;-)

Coffee Is Awesome!

A few weeks ago I noticed a cup on Dad's nightstand containing this strange-smelling hot liquid. Never one to pass up an opportunity for mischief, I drank a little, decided it tasted pretty good, so I went ahead and drank the rest. Weird part is, I was all jumpy for next 4 hours.

Turns out this strange substance is called 'coffee'. The other day I discovered that it's also available in a dry powdered form, but I like the taste of the liquid version much better.

Mom's Gonna Have A Litter!

I was snuggling with Mom on the bed today and noticed a second heartbeat coming from her belly. Seems a little strange that there's just the one instead of five or six, but whatever. I guess that explains all the strange things going on around here.

Now I'm Really Confused

Okay, so what the heck is this thing supposed to be? Things are starting to get just plain weird around here....